Monday, July 19, 2010

ゴジラ!



















Godzilla is our "post-neo-reformation" hero! Godzilla (Gojira?) is a daikaijū, a fictional giant Japanese monster, first appearing in Ishiro Honda's 1954 film Gojira. Since then, Godzilla has gone on to become a worldwide pop culture icon starring in 28 films produced by Toho Co., Ltd. The monster has appeared in numerous other media incarnations including video games, novels, comic books, television series, and an American remake. We used the Wheaton screenwriter braintrust to work up a new Godzilla treatment.

In the latest adaption Godzilla challenges the local american church showing it's fatal weaknesses. Godzilla is out to crush American church buildings across the country in hopes that the lukewarm members will get outside of their four walls and engage their communities. It's up to Wheaton College to reveal a new worldview weapon to ultimately defeat Godzilla in the remake "Sunday Morning is Every Morning"


Scene 1
Godzilla vs. Fake Sermons

Godzilla goes on a campaign to crush pulpits in small towns everywhere. Godzilla believes pastors are going online and downloading other peoples sermons and showing up to their local church and just reading the message. The monster is shredding church offices looking for evidence of plagiarism while pastors are sticking to their guns acting like the sermon illustrations actually happen to them.

Scene 2
Godzilla vs Lukewarm Layman

Godzilla goes on a rampage to flatten all the churches who are filled with Lukewarn Layman who show up for an hour of their week to fulfilled their Christian duty. These Layman leave with the concept that Christianity is just a mere additive to their lives. Lukewarm Layman think they are protected by Godzilla's fire after they completed their consumption of  the eucharist and donut, but find they are soon burned to crisp.

Scene 3
Godzilla vs. Legalism

In this scene Godzilla finds out that many churches still live in an environment of legalism and fear. The monster uses this and his fire breath to torch all churches who are still leading people down a path of rules. Legalism tries to fight back with twisting scripture to make it say they what they want. Godzilla wins but legalism still holds on in a few outposts. Legalism thought it was a 900ft competitor but once in battle it only measured at 9ft. even though they pray the sinners prayer on a daily basis to be safe. The Legalists form a line and poke at Godzillas feet with picket signs that say "God Hates Godzilla".

Scene 4
Godzilla vs. Bad Tithers

Godzilla unleashes his rage against the American Tither. This battle is quick because the American Tither uses less than 3% of their resources to fight the battle, while spending 97% on themselves. Bad Tithers thought their secret weapon of the "golf-a-thons and girl scout cookies fundraisers" would help their charity power, but no. Godzilla picks up and hurls all the luxury automobiles from the church parking lot to form a modern stonehenge in the church lawn.

Scene 5
Godzilla vs. Building Programs Over Missions

The church coming to the defense of the America Tither but soon realized that it also only had minimal resources to work with. The church was spending it's resources on building programs and frivolity while less than 2% was going overseas to fight poverty & justice initiatives. Godzilla stamps out these suburban mega-castles and the people are forced to meet in house churches.

Scene 6
Godzilla vs. The Box

Godzilla learns that local church is using all of its resources and energy to plan a service every sunday and doesn't have the energy or passion to live out its mission in the community. The local church team is worrying about finding an organist, getting the bulletins printed, filling childcare spots and writing a 50 minutes sermon and misses the big battle plan. Godzilla sneaks into each town and easily lures the town people away with the church noticing. Those christians still in the box are afraid of the outside world and believe as long as they stay in the box they will be safe.

Scene 7
Godzilla vs. Cheesy Outreach

In the final scene Godzilla challenges the church to a duel to reach their community. The church busts out a Harvest Festival as an alternative to halloween but fails. Godzilla throws a county fair with Blue Jazz and wins the first bout. The church then mails out a cheesy postcard to the community inviting them to a "living christmas tree choir" concert while Godzilla invites the community to a christmas tree lighting and Santa picture. Godzilla wins. The church then plans a special movie night to go see Fireproof while Godzilla invites the community to a minor league baseball game. Godzilla wins all 3 bouts.

The american church goes underground to form the rebellion. The sequel is called "Courageous" due in theaters in 2011.

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