Wednesday, June 2, 2010

This Bud's for You.



















Bud Williams is our "super" hero! Dr. Bud Williams '66 needs no introduction.

Bud recently crushed the HoneyRock in his bare hands, now it's called HoneyDiamond.

Bud Williams knows how to plug the gulf oil leak, he would dive down and change the law of physics.

Bud Williams carried Perry Mastodon on his back to the new science building.

Bud Williams is the reason Wheaton Heroes is afraid to reveal his identity.

Bud Williams can sing along with all  the Momja Kitty Warrior songs even before they are written.

Bud Williams has 2 speeds. Sprint and slalom.

Bud Williams doesn't own a chainsaw he just chews through the tree.

Bud Williams makes salad out of poison ivy.

Bud William's snoring creates earthquakes.

Bud Williams would have won the World Series 12 times if he had played for the Cubs.

Bud Williams only sleeps 3 hours a night, the rest of the time he is rotating the planet toward the sun.

Bud Williams wrote his syllabus on a computer he made himself out of old ford truck parts.

Bud Williams has wrestled 4 of the 7 Wheaton Presidents while using just his mind.

Bud Williams made Bud Wise Beer change their name to Budweiser.

Bud Williams doesn't ring the bell in the tower, he rings the tower.

Bud Williams gave Wes Craven nightmares.

Bud Williams gave blood once, they haven't run out yet.

Bud Williams ate Bolthouse Carrots once, now he can see through buildings.

Bud Williams rounded off Pi.

Bud Williams prays that Chuck Norris will someday "man up."

Bud Williams knows the names of all the animals in the forest, Adam told him personally.

Bud Williams doesn't drink milk out of a carton, he drinks the carton.

Bud Williams gave Gil Dodds a four minute head start.

Bud Williams carved a canoe out of petrified wood, blindfolded.

Bud Williams requires a fisheye lens and a football field for Vergara to take a portrait.

Bud Williams has built his own ropes course, it's called the Golden Gate Bridge.

Bud Williams challenged Barack Obama to a game of H O R S E, he now owns the US Treasury.

Bud Williams knows where Osama Bin Laden is, but he is giving him time to confess his sins.

Bud Williams coached the Olympic Gymnastic team and they won the weight lifting competition.

Bud Williams is a computer, his operating system is asparagus.


Bud Williams is ancient future.

Bud Williams makes Jack Bauer look laid back.

Bud Williams is off the Engel Scale.

Bud Williams ghost writes all of Michael Gerson's speeches.

Bud Williams catches his own food to eat, they usually surrender.

Bud Williams knew William Perry when he was still a dorm fridge.

Bud Williams was the reason the Dude abided.

Bud Williams doesn't watch tv, tv watches him.

Bud Williams didn't invent global warming, but with enough bike riding he will fix it.

Bud Williams can fit through an eye of a needle.

Bud Williams never sat through a chapel he liked, he stood.

Bud Williams doesn't clear the forest for trails, the forest gets out of his way.

Bud Williams can multiply by zero.

Bud Williams taught Winston Churchill not to give up.

Bud Williams was the inspiration for Johnny Knoxville.

Bud Williams walks onto campus and students yell "man on campus."

Bud Williams forgot Ann Curry's alma mater, on purpose.

Bud Williams beat Batman at arm wrestling, for six weeks after that Bud Williams had to fight crime.

Bud Williams would be stronger than Sampson, if he didn't cut his hair.

Bud Williams sweats XS Energy Drink™, Classic flavor.

Bud Williams makes his own electricity, while he sleeps.

Bud Williams doesn't get older, he goes farther.

Bud Williams cuts his own firewood after he digs up the roots.

Bud Williams would have already beaten the Philadelphia Flyers for the cup.

Bud Williams first job was logging, that's where Lake Michigan is now.

Bud Williams climbed to the top of the antenna on the Sears Tower and it became the tallest building in the world again.

Bud Williams is why Bono wrote the song, "Original of the Species"

Bud Williams has the real Wheaton Archives in his hand built garage, including a mystery cage.

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